Unorthodox yet potentially effective enhanced interrogation

As we all know now Messrs Bush, Cheney, Yoo Addington,Feith,Rumsfeld,Wolfowitz and the CIA in the last 8 odd years have developed a series of ahem non conventional techniques to get the proverbial bad guys to spill all. Brilliant in its vision and breathtaking in its stupidity the only flaw of course is that they don't work. But the basic idea I think was rather clever, after all why limit yourself to in-the-box thinking.

Therefore after much thought and research ( largely conducted while in the loo ) I have come up with some other techniques suggestions plans

1) All interrogations must be conducted in a language , that the detainee does not speak. Thus they will find it very difficult to lie.

2) Detainees should be constantly threatened with plastic surgery to make them look like Khalid Sheikh Mohammed

3)Detainees should be encouraged to use Google maps to find their way out of Guantanamo. Signs however should be erroneous causing much confusion and mirth. Guards should keep saying "Should Have used Bing" in an bad Scottish accent .

4)All access to Facebook should be denied

5) Compulsory sign up on twitter to follow Barry Manilow and Sarah Palin

6)Insist that detainees memorize the words to every Air Supply Song.

7) If all else fails tell them that they will be starring in a remake of Matrix III and that the movie will be continuously be broadcast to the village, Harsh yes, extreme maybe but on the whole justified I think